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Good Head Good Life

Clearly my title is a little tongue in cheek, but this blog will tell you why you need a partner who knows how to give good head. Laugh now, but I bet if you think about it you’ll realize if you ever been wit someone who knows how to suck good dick, you’ve been happy pretty often.

Now the premise of this is based on you having someone who both knows how and likes to suck dick. Think about when you’ve argued with the person and then it came time to have make up sex. Ain’t it grand when they just drop to they knees and start sucking your dick? You know it makes you feel good and then it just makes you wanna fuck em that much better and more. If this ain’t you it’s cool, just thinking about what made you mad will still get the job done I’m sure. LOL

But, I want you to also think about on them mornings that you gotta get up for work and you know you don’t wanna go. If your dude or woman there wit you and know your frustration, maybe they help give you some motivation and bless you before you gotta go. Maybe they even start while you sleep so you wake up and feel like the day gone be great. If you had this happen then you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Or think about that weekend action. You off and you know you can sleep in a lil late. Bae next to you and just slide down and go to bobbin on that dick, you know that shit makes you feel like a million dollars right. Ha! Maybe you got a freak for a partner and they start sucking on you while you out driving to where eva y’all bout to go or coming from. Who don’t like driving down the road gettin a good brain session? What about that lunchtime quickie? Ain’t got time to fuck, but got time to get slobbed on. Tell me that don’t set you right.. LOL

The tension that gets released, the frustration you can let out but fucking the hell out they throat while they sucking on you. If they like it rough, you can grab they hair and pull, if they ain’t got a lot, you push they head down on ya dick and enjoy the job that they doing. You ain’t gotta admit it, but it makes your sex life that much better. If they can suck you til you bust that nut, tell me a good nut from sum head don’t make feel you relaxed.

Now all those benefits were just given, imagine if you didn’t have that. The sex might still be good, but the sex might also be a lil boring. Limited foreplay but lots of fuckin..maybe. See sometimes if bae ain’t in the mood to give up the ass or pussy, that good brain will suffice for the night. Oh and by the way, if the reason it’s not being done is because they don’t know, then you should allow them opportunity to practice on you. So maybe you that kat that boo won’t blow you cuz they don’t know how. Let them practice. Because as we all know, Practice does make Perfect! LMAO

If you dare, leave ya comments and lets have a lil chat about it.

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T.H.O.T.

I was laughably having a conversation with my boyfriend a couple weeks back and we were talking about this potential topic and I said that it was time to write it. I know that this will cause a little bit of hurt feelings but hey, if it does, then maybe that means it applies to you. Now what you do with what gets said in this blog is your choice.

First let me make sure I help those who might not know what these letters mean that I’ve used to title this blog. T.H.O.T means That Hoe Ova There. I wanted to talk about this because I’m alarmed at how many people are picking THOTS as their partners and then shocked when the relationship doesn’t work out or surprised when certain things happen. Just by rule a THOT is not a boyfriend or girlfriend, they’re a FUCK simply put.

This will focus on the men because I’ve no damn clue about properly identifying all the different type of female THOT’s but as for men, especially gay men go, baby I’m going to give you the damn book. Sit back and relax. Enjoy the read, get you a good laugh and take notes, because the next time you think you got sum good, you might have a man in disguise, they just might be a THOT.

Let me give a few characteristics of the feminine and masculine THOT. First the fem THOT. If he looks extra cute, but tells you he inbetween jobs or has lots of money but can’t tell you what he does for a living.. THOT. If his phone is constantly going off while y;all on a date and he gives you the stupid look.. he a THOT. If you go out and lots of people know him and look at you funny, he’s a THOT. If his asshole feels kinda hollow.. he a THOT. If he can slide your dick inside of him without no lube.. he a THOT. If he says that he needs 10+ inch dicks only.. he a THOT. If he expects you to pay for everything and y;all just met.. he a THOT. If he can’t talk about nothing but sex and how good he is.. he a THOT.

For the more masculine man.. if he sexy and ain’t got a job but always keep income.. he a THOT. If his phone keeps going off and has to constantly excuse himself.. he a THOT. IF y’all on a date and all the fem boys gawking at him.. he a THOT. If his dick can’t stay hard while y’all fucking.. he a THOT. If he can’t bust a nutt.. he a THOT. If he keeps condoms on him.. he a THOT. If he asks can he nut inside you on the first time.. he a THOT. If he needs to hide his phone all the time.. he a THOT.

By the way, here are a few communal traits that you might wanna look out for. If he always wants to fuck no matter when you last had sex.. he a THOT. If every time you see him at the club his shirt is always off.. he a THOT. If you constantly see him leaving with someone else.. say it.. he a THOT. Don’t let your one night stand turn into Fatal Attraction wit a THOT because you will always end up burned. LOL

Yes there can be exceptions to these character traits, but I can pretty much bet you that if you see these traits in the dude you think is your man, it’s probably a good chance that he’s a THOT. Warning: Be careful!! Because THOT’s want to be loved too and they will mask themselves very well in order to feel that love and continue to be taken care of. Watch for the street, educated THOT. Those are the ones who don’t need your money, but definitely wanna add your ass or dick to their collection plate. Yes, go on and fuck, but no don’t get your feelings attached.

Yes, I know there will people who disagree wit this and that’s fine. But after almost 14 years of experience in this lifestyle, I can say with much confidence that 99% of the THOTs in these streets exhibit these character traits. My goal is to help you notice what you gettin so that you don’t try to turn community dicks/ass into relationship dicks/ass, because for you that means disappointment.

Lemme know what you think.. How you feel. Let’s discuss. Both sides are welcome to speak.

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A Call to Arms

I’ve been watching, I’m sure like most of the world, as we’ve bear witness to more Police on Civilian killing. Let me more specific, Black Men being killed by White Cops. Terence Crutcher in Tulsa, Oklahoma, Tyre King in Ohio and Keith Scott in North Carolina. Three shootings. Officers not using discretion to assess the situation, rather, using their power to shoot and kill instead.

I’ve heard the folks, mostly Conservative Whites, shouting that Mr. Crutcher had PCP in his car and has a criminal background. Since when the fuck did that provide rationale for a cop to kill a man who is unarmed. By the way, there was no way to know that he had the drugs on him until after the investigation on the car, not during the incident. His criminal past, really? If that’s the case then many people, White and Black should be dead by now. Get the fuck outta here with that rationale.

In case one hadn’t been paying attention, at least we do know that Officer Shelby will be standing trail for Manslaughter charges in this particular case, but the other two situations are a lot less tenable and still all the more troubling. A thirteen year old boy was gunned down by police, in the case of Mr. King. The headlines read that he was “more than likely” running away from the cops when he was killed. And for Mr. Scott his wife has released the video and well, I’ll let you judge for yourself.

Protests continue to occur across the nation, as here in Atlanta there will be three scheduled for today and tomorrow. A protest of the local shopping mall and a request to wear black. And a protest downtown tonight at the Civil Rights Center. I like the idea but there needs to be more. We need to really sit face to face with law enforcement and have a true discussion. Fuck the feelings, fuck the cameras. It’s time to really have this out for the world to see, why do White officers predispose Black men to death, instead of trying to assess and diffuse the situation. Isn’t that part of the oath of an officer, to serve and protect.

Pulling your gun and killing someone is not serving and protecting. It’s taking justice into your own hands. It’s playing the role of God and least we not forget there is only One God. God sits up high and looks down low, so those cops trying to play judge and jury should sit back and think about that. I’m really sick and tired of this happening and then when the sides are taken, it’s always I support the Cops because they have a hard job and Black people need to learn to cooperate and Black Lives Matter.

When do we stop to realize that we are all responsible for this. We as people need to sit down and ask ourselves how do we address this epidemic. You see while we talk about all the other shit going on, this is the real epidemic that’s going unresolved. We let the media and Politicians talk, but where are the every day folks who are really being affected by this? Why is the protest by NFL QB Kap and others so important, because when celebrities being an issue to the table it seems to spread like wildfire and then the regular folks fighting on the front line get noticed even more. It creates conversation in places that regular people can’t get those talks to happen.

It’s time to bring everybody to the table, Celebrities, Police, Law Makers, Regular People, we need to talk. We need to learn the problem and most importantly to solve it. Because we can say what it is all day and the Law Enforcement community can deny it until their purple. The facts are that many cops are scared of Black Men and fear for their lives so they shoot first, conjure up a story second, and speak contrition last. I’m sick of that. Come out in open and dialogue.

We the People demand justice. We the people demand the truth and you the Law Enforcement Community should oblige. It’s time to stop hiding from the ugly epidemic and make in roads to solve the problem and heal our communities. But the truth is, many don’t want that. Because that would be too much like admitting that Black people are equal to Whites. And for many, that’s something they still don’t want to accept. Don’t believe it.. Ask President Obama.

As a resident of Atlanta, GA I heard on the radio that students at two local High Schools staged protests and sit ins to voice themselves.  I love it! Shows that they hear, know and want to be involved. We as adults now need to take that a step further. Continue to protest and apply pressure to be heard and seen, but also come up with real life solutions. Community engagement and damn it voting on election day. You really want to shake things up, go to the polls and remove them folks that’s made a living taking your money but not solving your issues.

It’s time to take a stand for what truly needs to be done. America we need justice. America we need answers. America we need leaders!

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The Truth shows itself…

You know I’ve been reading and listening to the things being said by athletes, coaches and former athletes in regards to Kapernick’s stance on kneeling for the flag and the subsequent protests by other players and team across the NFL. I heard Trent Dilfer called Kap’s move disgraceful and Tony LaRussa questions his sincerity, you’ve had Dabo Sweeney say that the protests are over played and that the Black community has equality to Whites.

The truth is the more this topic gets discussed, the more we realized that we are still right where we’ve always been. Elite White people have no fucking clue about what’s going on. I’m watching the faces who speak and what they say and it’s clear that we need more conversation about the issues and we need to realize what the purpose of the protests are really for. Kap isn’t protesting the Military vets who’ve served to defend the nation and protect the flag, he’s protesting the injustices that continue to proliferate American society.

The other players across the League that have joined him are standing up for their communities to protest the injustices happening to people of color. And it’s interesting that there are those White people who seem to understand and agree with the movement and others who just look ignant as fuck and that’s a shame. I saw what Skip Bayless of FS1 had to say about Trent Dilfer of ESPN and I’m so glad that Skip gets it. All these players who played with hundreds of Black athletes are giving these Jim Crow opinions are pretty sad to see.

Are we in the same place that we use to be.. Not technically, but are we at a equal place in this country…Hell Nah. Hopefully this debate will continue to center on the issues.. racial inequality and injustice, and not on professional athletes, who are actual human beings, protesting the Anthem of the United States of America. See that distraction is critical to the discussion as a whole. We can’t get caught up in the Act, because you miss the message. The message is we need to get justice for all.

Lastly, let me take this last paragraph to rail again the Owner of my favorite football team, and maybe even chastise them a little. Jerry Jones, owner of the Dallas Cowboys, man you can tell that you’re out of touch from your players. To have the nerve to say you’re disappointed because human beings chose to protest their outrage in this country with the social injustices is disgusting. You’re the disappointment Jerry. You give women abusers second chances, but you don’t like players standing up for what they believe in? How dare you act like you don’t see it. or maybe you don’t. Maybe because you’re that elite White man who knows nothing but privilege, you ain’t even qualified to open your fucking mouth. A sad commentary on owner who prides himself on giving guys a chance. Maybe you need to spend more time with your Black players to understand why the protests happen as they do.

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The Pain of Moving On

Whenever you’ve spent years of your life participating in someone’s life day in and day out, week in and week out, it’s hard to say good bye and let that go. But there comes a time when you have to read the leaves and allow for the breeze to blow them in another direction. As you see this happening more often in you life, you have to also think if maybe you’re being prepared for the next phase of life.

Seeing someone pull away from a bond you thought would never end is never easy to accept. Watching the friendship whither and end is always difficult, but the truth is, as Madea said best, everybody in your life has a season. I’ve said to folks many times that you have to be able to accept when someone’s season is up in your life. You can want to hold on all you want, but you gotta be able to stiffen up ya back and say farewell. Maybe the wind blows them back after some time and maybe they continue to blow them further away, just know that you did your best the rest will eventually fall in place.

Something else that was also said during one of Madea’s monologues was that if you tell someone that something they’re doing is affecting your friendship/relationship with them and they make an effort to change, you need to hold on to those folks because they’re trying and showing you that they’re a root and not a branch or leaf. I believe that the reason an action like this is so important, is because it shows that the person values you in their life and that’s something that can’t be duplicated. Either someone wants to have your friendship or they don’t.

I understand all the reasons why people hang on and keep believing that whomever the person is will come around. If you spend years sharing moments and adventures then severing that tie is hard. If you have emotional connections that one may feel transcended the relationship and now it seems like there’s a cold distance, you feel obligated to hang around to see if you can find out what’s wrong and fix it. But, the truth is if all these are true and you find yourself in this position, maybe it’s the truest sign that the time has come to let go and let the benediction take it’s place.

Never say never, but sometimes the end is needed for progression with the plan in your life. Sometimes, we have to be ok with understanding that the steps of our lives are ordered and the ending of a long time relationship is part of the path designed for your life. Because we gotta remember, if something or someone is meant to be around in any capacity they will be and there’s nothing that can stop it. So I know for a fact that this is something that affects many and torments a lot, but if you really think about it it’s something that always has to happen.

Live free, be strong and keep moving on, greater and better are only a moment away.

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Open Up to Love

I’ve been a very vocal proponent over the years of allowing yourself to love and be loved. I have also said that you never know when it’s going to happen, how it will happen and where it will come from. Many times we feel like we need to have it happen the “pure” way that the older folks and mostly Church folks say it should happen. You know, meet and talk. Go on a few plutonic dates and have the night end there. No sex for a while in order to see if it’s lust or love, and then move from there.

If you know me, you know I say that’s pure bull shit in todays age. Yes, there can be harmless dates and courtship and flirting, but the reality also is that people wanna fuck and see if they like the dick or ass or pussy as much as if they like the person. Disagree with me all you want, but that’s just the truth of the matter. I don’t really care if anyone agrees with my last statement, but if you’re honest about it, most times that’s exactly how it goes. There might be a couple dates thrown in there, but I can also bet that sex will come to the front of the list sooner than later.

I get so tired of people meeting up and trying to sound the alarm of the wholesome guy who’s never done anything and they always need to know you before they fuck you, when in their minds they thinking of how can they make the sex happen before the end of the first month or two. LOL! One of the most critical elements of love is truth. Whether it’s a freak speaking their truth or a conservative person speaking their truth. Love will allow for you to be open and honest enough to express all that you want and letting the chips fall where they may.

As I like to say, you never know when love will strike and most times it happens when you truly least expect it. You can think you about to have a normal hookup. Just a nut and before you know it you and that person realize that you truly might be meant to be. That’s when you have tune out the naysayers and ignore those who say that it’s just lust that will fade. You gotta believe that things happen for a reason and what you feel is truly real. If you think it won’t be tested, you can think again. Love is always tested. Relationships are always challenged. See that’s how you find out if it’s truly real. The challenges and tests let you know if the person is really for you. If the love is truly real or just a means to survive.

Yes it’s scary and creates a vulnerability that you have to accept, but the reward is better than any fear you can have. The reason that you gotta open yourself is because no one wants to spend their life alone, and if you find someone that fits into your puzzle, why would you keep them out just because you’re afraid. Just always remember, you’re love between the two of you is just that yours. No one can tell you how to love each other nor how to show it. If you like to display your affection in public do it, if you like to please your lover do it. Because always remember they love you because who you are and what you aren’t. Open yourself and let your soul be free to get caught up in the mystery. Love, feel, breathe and enjoy. The journey will reward you if you stay true to your soul.

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The Mistake that Changed Me

Many times we think of mistakes as always being negative. But maybe we need to think of them as opportunities. In my opinion it is only through mistakes do we learn how to become people. It’s also through these mistakes that we figure out what we like and don’t like. We learn how to read people and to better protect ourselves.

One of the biggest mistakes that I made, changed everything about who I was, but it also helped mold me into the man that I would up becoming today. I made the mistake of trusting someone before I got to know who they really were. I made the mistake of overriding my instinctual feelings that something was wrong, because I wanted to get away from a situation.

I learned the hard way why I should always listen to my instincts when it comes to people. Primarily, because my instincts aren’t wrong. I have a scary good judgment of character and I can smell trouble from a mile  away. The mistake that I was not following that intuition and I paid dearly for it. I went through things that I had never thought I would go through.

From the constant arguing to the embarrassing weekly fights that led to many rough nights. I have to always remember that the mistake I made put me in this position. I have to realize that that make also paved the way for me to figure out a lot more about myself. I learned how to overcome extreme situations. I learned how to have an even stronger backbone without feeling bad. learned how to overcome a small mistake by correcting it before it blow up.

Mistakes have the power to grow up an individual and boy did this mistake grow me up. It made me realize that in this world, once you get out on your own you have to protect yourself because there will certainly be no one else who will do it the way you can for yourself. This mistake taught me that no matter how well intentioned your friends may be, unless they’re readily accessible you have to be able to do it all yourself.

This mistake taught me that all love ain’t good love. This mistake taught me that even the sweetest person can be extremely dangerous and you can never overlook their behavior as a one off. Mistakes will change you, mistakes can break you, but most of all mistakes will truly grow you, if you allow yourself to learn the lesson from the mistake.

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If It Ain’t About Yo Money

It’s interesting to me that I continue to come across guys that seem to think that the love of their partner has to be shown by how much money is spent on them. Whether it be them being taken on a date, or being brought clothes, shoes and so on. It’s amazing to see how many people really base their happiness off of whether or not they man or woman is willing to spend they money on them, or take care of them.

It’s been a time old tradition that the one with less feels like they gotta be given more. Or the one being chased must always get what they want in order to say that their pursuer is truly feeelin them. I’ve come to understand some of the logic behind that method of thinking, but I’m would be lying if I said it makes complete sense. I’m thankful that I’ve been able to have a couple relationships where my guy was more concerned with how much I could love on them, make them happy, do the small things that built its way to bigger things.

Maybe people have gotten use to that because that’s what t.v. says is supposed to happen. The movies are created with the high balla gettin what he wants, while the regular man is continually passed over until the end, when he’s shown to have been the best choice. I think that we have to have a real conversation as to whether or not we’re really being smart about how we teach our children and loved ones to look for and determine what love really looks like.

What happens if that person falls on hard times? Maybe they get laid off, or get sick and can’t continue to provide like they once were. They can’t buy you the hundreds of dollars of stuff you use to. Would you still be right there beside them? Would you still claim them, or just like the wind, would you blow in the direction of the next highest bidder? Sounds like a prostitute, doesn’t it? But say that out loud and baby you can get ready for a full blown argument.

While I will never tell anyone what to look for or how to go about finding love, I will always tell you the truth about why your love life is failing. I will tell you that the reason things fall apart is because you’re looking for the wrong things. Happiness should never be able to be brought. And, it should never have a time limit placed on it either. Nobody walking this Earth knows when or how they’re going to fall in love. You could think that the same random sex act you’ve set up will deliver the same results and before you know it, you’ve found someone that actually fits everything that you are and want.

The point I’m making is.. it’s not always about the money. And it ain’t always about doing things the “wholesome” way. Sometimes, you have to just live your life and let things happen as it may. The spoiling will take care of itself, as long as the love is there.

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Suspect Spirits Stay Away

If you’ve been into church at all then you’ve heard the saying to be careful who you let in your house. If you talk to enough older people, they’ll tell you the exact same thing. When you’re young you have no damn clue what the hell they talking bout. As you get older though, that shit starts to make a whole lot of sense. What they’re really saying is you really can’t open your door to just anybody.

Now I know the bible says treat your fellow man with kindness and to treat them as you want yourself to be treated. But, I think that there’s something to be said for the man who smiles in your face but tries to destroy you behind your back. Whether it’s you personally or the relationship you in or whatever. I’ve come to learn that once that negative spirit makes its way into your circle, it can make it difficult to remove. Thus, it can make your relationship or home toxic.

Maybe that’s one of the reasons that some of the folks who don’t really care for me don’t like me. Because as I’ve been very open to saying, if I don’t get a good vibe off you then the first time you come in my presence will also be your last. I’m not very open to dealing with drama and I don’t do, what I call, black spirits. Those are the kinds of people and spirits that give you pause. Cause that black spirit hangs around your home long after that black person has left.

And for the ignorant out there, no I’m not talking about the color of your skin, because black spirits exist in all colors, races, creeds and orientations of people. So please make sure that you keep a check on who comes around you and in your space, because if you’re not careful that negative spirit will be on whatever you touch.

One of the hardest things to deal wit though, is when your significant others’ family member or members are the negative one and you gotta allow some kinda blending of ya space because it’s important to them. I’ve long since wondered how does one deal wit that? When do you say enough is enough and when do you just smile like a fake bitch and deal wit it. For someone like me, this is very difficult. Because if you know me then you know that I don’t really care for much of the fakeness mentality, I just prefer to tell ya ass how I feel and let you adjust accordingly.

Even if you just like to fuck and you have a lot of random sex, you must be careful of the people and spirits you let inside your house while you thinking bout how good that dick, ass or pussy bout to be. Cuz once you bust that nut the aura is still inside your house. Say what you will about the religious aspects of this thought process, the logistical and realistic approach is damn sho on point. If a nigga vibe is wrong, keep they ass out your space.

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You’re A Conqueror

Many times throughout life we get caught up in the daily grind and forget just how much stuff one has overcome throughout your lifetime. Whether it’s getting over a illness, dealing with a terminal illness, recovering from a messy breakup, overcoming poverty, surviving a violent relationship, or just making it through the rough patches in life. Sometimes you have to stop and realize that no matter what you’re a conqueror.

If you’ve ever survived a violent relationship and you’re living to tell the story they you truly are a conqueror. There are so many people, both men and women, who have lost their lives due to the senseless and inhumane, extreme violence inside their relationship. Can you imagine if you’ve had to hide scars and bruises. Handle the mental anguish of lying to those you love in order to protect your privacy. Doesn’t matter if you’re the strongest or weakest individual; it takes great strength and will to recover from something that traumatic. So if you’re still able to give ya testimony about what you went through, you’re definitely a conqueror.

For anyone whose dealt with any type of severe illness. Whether it’s one that’s curable or one that’s terminal. Do you remember how you felt when you first got that diagnosis. What was your immediate reaction? The doubts and insecurities started to creep into your mind. Your mortality began to flash before your eyes. Mostly because you know someone or multiple people who have dealt with the same illness you have and haven’t been as fortunate. But, just think about it for a minute. If you’re still here to tell your story and help someone else to cope with their illness or raise money to find the cure, you’re a conqueror.

We’ve all been through an emotional, messy, difficult breakup in our lives. Whether it be a marriage, long term relationship, engagement or whatever the case may be, we all know what it feels like to have had a heartbreak. The toll it takes on your body and on your emotions. The disappointment and the energy it takes to start over from the beginning again. To detach from someone you loved and to see yourself beginning your relationship journey all over again. While in the beginning it seems so imposing and difficult, you let some time pass by and then you realize how much you made it thru.. say it wit me.. you’re a conqueror.

No matter the situation. Abandoned by your mother or father, being betrayed by your best friend, overcoming a challenging work environment, financial troubles, whatever the circumstance. If you’ve made on the other side of thru and even if you’re still in the middle of the storm, as long as you haven’t given up then you still are a conqueror. Never let the storm take you under. Always remember that you will be able to overcome any situation. You are a conqueror.

I could go on forever with situations and challenges that we’ve all overcome but it would only go to reinforce the point that’s been made. No matter what it is, if you’ve managed to get through, you’re a conqueror. Now reflect, breathe a little and tell yourself that you can do it.