You know one of the biggest misconceptions in the gay community, especially the Black Gay community, is that if your eccentric or you have color in your hair then you must be feminine or somehow not as masculine as a dude who has muscles, or one solid, low-top hair color. So I don’t understand how that’s actually true. Because if I’m completely honest, there are sooooo many gays who have the “masculine” look in a picture or in physically, but you let them open their mouths and they are as gay and flaming as they come.

See I think once again we’ve been brainwashed by “society” to think that somehow if you have a different look that makes you stand out, you automatically have to be deemed feminine or not masculine enough. If you have pictures that aren’t just of your dick and chest or your ass and chest you aren’t manish enough. You have to either be fully clothed, or flippin the bird in the picture. You gotta be blowing smoke or displaying a gun or gun sign in the general area of your photo. You have to be a dread head or have the low cut with waves all the way through.

I wish someone in this lifestyle can help me understand why in this day in age when are in such an uproar for equality and freedom. When so many Black men who are gay want to be judged based on their content and not who they fucking, why do they still stereotype each other because one doesn’t look like what the world has said for ages must be the look of a masculine man?

Could it be possible that we still suffer from Post Traumatic Slavery Disorder? Damn right I said it. The reality of the situation is that in every cultural dynamic that exists in the black community we seem to preach this idea of a man being hard and niggerish. Having this rough exterior and talking with little respect for their fellow gay men. Why is the community so accepting of a man who sags his pants down to their kneecaps and is tatted up; but the man who is sharply dressed business professional or the eccentric musical stylist or artist is somehow not quite as manly?

I understand why so many black gay men choose to date men who are Puerto Rican or Asian or White or any other ethnic makeup; because they realize how stereotyping and cynical the Black gay community can be. We bitch and moan so much about not being treated fairly and unfair labels being placed on us, but do we ever stop and realize that we do so much damage to ourselves by always wanting to match up to what the hetero world says we should look like to be deemed “masculine”.

Tell me your thoughts America. Lets have this dialogue.