Given that I have dated guys who have a shit load of rules, and also have dated guys who play it by ear and everything in between I feel that this topic really strikes also at the heart of why there are so many relationship issues these days. You know since there so many relationship guru’s and with Steve Harvey’s book, everybody seems to be looking for some set of guiding principles in determining who they want to date, should date, how long to date, when to act on the sexual urges, when to invite them to stay the night and all sorts of other shit.

Personally, I am not the guy who is all about “rules.” I think that yes, you should always have a guiding set of principles and a standard that you have for yourself, but it should not be so extreme that you don’t allow the natural order of life and love, emotion and passion to run its course and have a say in who you love, how you love and when you love. Far too many times, people rely on others instead of their innate ability to self determine who and what is right for them. As it is commonly said and I damn sure agree, what works for me may not work for you. I think today everyone sees a someone they know or respect or what have you in a relationship that looks successful on the outside and it may truly be successful, but the methods that that couple are taking to make theirs work certainly should be the basis for anyone else to make their decisions.

See to me the guy who wants to establish all these damn parameters and rules for how things will go to me is one who is really insecure and not able to control his own actions and emotions; so he enlists this laundry list of rules and time frames that determine when he will do this or when he will do that. And this is not reserved for just men, women are just as bad times, if not worse than men. The conscious effort to make a man wait a predetermined number of days or months before the next level things happen can definitely help determine if they are more interested in you or your body; but I also think that it can also dilute the process. What better way to really gauge someone then to allow situations to dictate how you do things and not some fixated number.

All rules are meant to be broken at some point and yes I do believe in that as well. Because you sometimes even the best laid plan doesn’t always work out as we intend it to. So my thought is why not have a mixture of the two. A little structure with a little instinctual behavior. See I believe the ones who really figure out how to deal with people the best are the ones who know how to blend the two and tailor it to each individual not a blanket set of rules for all.

So which type of person are you? Are you the strictly by the book kinda person? Do you like to let it fly and see let nature run its course? Or are you somewhere in between..prudent, yet still slightly unpredictable?

#Happy rule book hunting..